A house with people coming and going regularly every day has been a comfort to my heart for many days now. A house with the smells of supper cooking away, boys talking and laughing about who knows what, and sharing suppers together every night have been my normal since Sunday. I'm not ready for my normal to change. I'm not ready to send this group back to the United States. I'm going to miss having someone just across the room that completely understands my goofy sense of humor and fascination with quoting lines from random movies. I'm going to miss having someone here that I can just look at and both of us start to giggle. I'm going to miss having someone here that understands the cause of my sometimes scary and strange dreams. I'm just being wholeheartedly honest.
Sending them home signifies the beginning of a completely new phase of my stay here in Kenya. The wonder and excitement of everything is beginning to wear off and I am starting to see some things for what they really are. This is a good thing. It is time to stop seeing things through the rose colored glasses and start to see the world as it really is here in Kenya. I know that can't really begin until I begin to experience life on my own. For the first time in a long time, I feel as though I finally made a choice to do something that was entirely for myself and didn't have to be concerned with who needed me to be at home and take care of something for them. This is a time to learn what I am really capable of doing while completely on my own.
Furthermore, I am completely ready to go beyond just surface knowledge of a lot of things here. Deeper relationships with the kids at the school and the orphanage are beginning to build, and for that I am very thankful. Those kids, all 350 plus of them, are incredibly special to me. I don't know all of their names yet, but I will learn them eventually. I want to know more than their names! I want to know their stories even though I am certain that their stories will probably break my heart into millions of pieces. I am also quite excited about the new friends that I have made since I have come to Kenya. Many of these look to be life long friendships, and that alone is great. I wasn't sure how that was going to work, leaving all of my friends behind at home and venturing off into a foreign country. God is faithful and meets us at our point of need. He knew that in order for me to feel at home, I would need some friends, and that is exactly what He provided very quickly into my stay here. Friends and kids... what more would my teacher heart need to feel at home? Not much else! Going beyond surface knowledge isn't just limited to the kids and new friends. I am probably most excited about learning more about Jim. We've been communicating for almost an entire year now. It isn't easy though to reveal the most personal details and stories about yourself over a computer screen. Those things have to be done in person and I am so glad that we have the time now to do just that.
For now, I am learning to be content in the newness of this experience. I am looking forward to it becoming less new and more familiar. Time will most certainly tell if this new normal is the plan that God has for me to become my everyday normal. I look forward to sharing the experience with you all.
It is time to get ready for another day here in Kenya: time at the feeding station serving fruit to the children, lunch at the Coffee Shop, visiting one of the kids at boarding school, spending time with the kids at the orphanage for devotions, and hopefully some time with Jim tonight. Days are always full of things to do, people to see, and children to love. I wouldn't trade my days for anything.
Until the next time
~Melody~
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